Is Each Day A Challenge?
We have made it to September in 2020. Each day may be a challenge for you. I suspect folks might be managing hour to hour or minute by minute. Self compassion can be very helpful in these days, hours or minutes. We may be working on projects, to do lists, goals, or intentions. Is it okay to have a list and not do everything on it? It is okay if every day is a challenge, can you identify any moments or hours that felt peaceful to you?
To Do List
From Alan Trapulionis, from his article Doing Nothing is an Act of Courage, ” There’s a reason why we enjoy crossing things off our to-do lists. Over the course of evolution, our brains have developed to reward completed tasks with a release of dopamine. Whenever our brains register that ‘a task has been completed,’ it gives us a temporary high — to keep us craving for more.” To Do lists can help us feel organized, but do we use them to be hard on ourselves? Do we have to cross everything off that list? Is it even possible? I do not think it is possible.
Is it Better To Be Busy?
When someone asks you how you are, do you answer with the things you are “doing”? I do sometimes and I am trying to understand what that means. I think it I am saying, I am valuable because of these things. It gives me something to hang on to, external activities that can be measured in minutes or hours or days. People will also answer with “I am keeping busy” as if this is the right answer or the right way to be. Is it unfair to be judging each other or ourselves on “how busy’ we are?
Self Compassion
When we do not cross everything or anything off the To Do list, is that okay? If someone were to ask you, I suspect you would say, yes that is okay. Will you say that to yourself? Will you practice self compassion? Can you embrace what feels more meaningful to you, even if it is not on your list? From Dr. Kristin Neff, “With self-compassion, we give ourselves the same kindness and care we’d give to a good friend.” The website, selfcompassion.org, has a lot of resources to check out and consider if you are being hard on yourself at this time.
